Edwin was abused as a child

Hi, my name is Edwin. I live and grew up in Singapore. Sonal Kellogg is a friend whom i met when i was in India. I found that she was woman who found who she is in Christ. There seems to be this tempered sense of idealism about her, that make her able to behold and overcome her past of sexual abuse and come out to share and inspire others to share their stories. I found that we had this same common ground because i was in a way sexually abused too when i was young.

Whenever i walked past my uncles, they would just reach out to grope my private part and laughed about it. This only happened sporadically from i was 4 until around 10 years of age. I was never penetrated physically, but trust for my family was shattered. It definitely seared an impression in me, a false impression – that i wasn’t meant to be protected, and just a play thing for these grown ups. So i grew up with such a wrong idea, and because i was not able to respect myself, i too could not learn to respect women. Pornography and all these hypersexualized culture we live in absolutely didn’t help a misguided young boy like me. It deepened my hunger, in fact it left an endless void within me that truly no one single woman could satisfy. So my life from age 13 from 21 was spent indulging in pornographic materials and also sexual intimacies with women. It was absolutely terrible, where the world lied to me that “stolen water is sweet” i only found it to be absolutely bitter. It is a privilege to have God so wondrously save me from such a life, and my prayer is that you too would come to experience the reality of the saving grace of Jesus Christ.

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